Covid 19 Don’t Touch Me! song


An anthem for days in coronavirus  isolation when everything has turned or stopped or just gone mad.

I did a series on 936 ABC radio with Ryk Goddard for years called The Muse Headlines. I would present a song every Friday morning that summed up the weeks news to a familiar melody. It started as a contest, but then we just did it for fun. IN light of current global events, it seemed right to bring it back. So, try not to sing this after you hear it!

Full credit to Redgum for the awesome melody.


Sometime in the night my telephone it made a beep to say some-

One in another country had a cough

Then it came to pass that everyone including people in the

White house had to say ‘bugger off’


And now I’m all alone and my bin it overflows

With plastics that contained elixirs and covers for my nose

And what’s these rules that come between us no one really knows

Don’t touch me – it’s Covid-19


Shaking hands with feet feels like I’m playing secret soccer with everybody

every time we say hello

It’s just like Pokémon but there’s no ball or goals or rules and nothing happens

Then we turn and go


Can I come to work or am I shall I binge watch zombie flicks

The pantry’s full of cans of beans and out of date corn chips,

I’ll thank my lucky stars I never got on that cruise ship

Don’t touch me – it’s Covid-19


Once when I was 10 I broke my foot and all my friends they came to

See me and wish me all the best

Now I’m home alone and no one cares except the boss who just keeps

Calling, Here comes the rising stress


But how can I claim stress leave when I’m already home

The NBN’s so slow I can’t log in to work and so

I’ll just watch some TV, eat some chips and blow my nose

Don’t touch me – it’s Covid-19



And can you tell me doctor will it affect my poo?

Cause I killed a man for his dunny roles and I’ll do the same to you

Can everybody take a breather, you know what to do

Don’t kiss me – it’s Covid-19

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